Bella. Machiavellian genius. If she devoted her considerable intelligence toanything other than stealing food she would have taken over the world by now. Briefly nicknamed Little Miss Piss after peeing in a bag of apples left on the kitchen floor until we realised that sounded like a pornstar name. 3/5 for shoutiness, has a meow that sounds like she smokes three packets of fags a day.

A brown and white tabby cat lounges on a cushion. She has the white inverted V off centre on her face which makes her look like she has an emo haircut with a long fringe swept over one eye.

The boys, Salem (AKA Black pudding) and Ciel (AKA The Tuxedo Torpedo). Brothers who share custody of a single braincell. Found in a wrecked car in a scrapyard as feral kittens, currently the least feral cats you will ever meet. Hobbies include being on top of humans and trying to be on top of humans when said humans should have left for work 5 minutes ago. 1/5 look like they should be loud but actually peep instead of meowing.

Ciel, a tuxedo cat with one eye due to an eye infection when he was found as a kitten. Luxuriating in a perfectly proportioned box.Myself lying on the kitchen floor, and being sat on by Salem, a large glossy black cat with apparent hypnotic powers
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