Kim Scheinberg @kims@mas.to
Public

What did I just read?

"He had a chest of drawers, entirely empty except for a lint roller, pens, and in one corner, a pink vibrator. “It’s for girls, you know,” said Roy. “I used to use this one on my ex.” There were also some objects that didn’t seem to belong in a frat house. In one of the common areas, a shelving unit was completely empty except for an anime figurine. You could peer up her plastic skirt & see the plastic underwear molded around her plastic buttocks"

harpers.org/archive/2026/03/ch

Suddenly, Roy seemed to acknowledge my presence. He offered me a tour. There was something he very badly wanted to impress on me, which was that Cluely cultivates a fratty, tech-bro atmosphere. Their pantry was piled high with bottles of something called Core Power Elite. I was offered a protein bar. The inside of the wrapper read DAILY INTENTIONS: BE MY BOSS SELF. “We're big believers in protein,” Roy said. “It’s impossible to get fat at Cluely. Nothing here has any fat.” The kitchen table was stacked with Labubu dolls. “It’s aesthetics,” Roy explained. “Women love Labubus, so we have Labubus.” He showed me his bedroom, which was in the office; many Cluely staffers also lived there. Everything was gray, although there wasn’t much. “I'm a big believer in minimalism,” he said. “Actually, no, I'm not. Not at all. I just don’t really care about interior decoration.” ... There were also some objects that didn’t seem to belong in a frat house. In one of the common areas, a shelving unit was completely empty except for an anime figurine. You could peer up her plastic skirt and see the plastic underwear molded around her plastic buttocks. More figurines in frilly dresses seemed to have been scattered at random throughout the building. Roy showed me his Hinge profile. He was looking for a “5°2, asian, pre-med, matcha-loving, funny, watches anime, white dog having, intelligent, ambitious, well dressed, CLEAN 19-21 year old.” One picture showed him cuddling a giant Labubu.
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