the creases of the bit’s eye radiated out, long beams of light stretched across the abyss from an endlessly darker star.

..what color even were her eyes?

“become me and i become you. do whatever is funniest at a given time and we will become so intertwined that, well—”

her irises folded over and through themselves, shimmering in the static fluorescent light. mesmerizing as it was, this wasnt new. what was new was that they were getting bigger. good. perhaps if i could drift through that starry space, i would finally understand it. the rest of her face is growing too. oh, im leaning forward.

would it look like i was leaning in for a kiss? would that be so bad?

her laugh finally snaps me out of the trance. “bold. that’ll be useful.” she starts moving her head toward mine, fast. i try jerking my head out of the way. its too slow to prevent a collision, but im not exactly swimming in options.

her head passes straight through mine.

“im not really here. at least not as you would judge it. changing that is your job”

she’s gone.

years pass. i’ve led the taliban and made them all transition. i ran a successful presidential campaign for a dog and made it establish ‘national fuck a couch day’ federally to commemorate the birthday of JD Vance. [3rd item].

none of it was funny enough. my body aches. every piece of my being feels ready to burst. i put on a dress meant for a wedding, ensuring it lays immaculately, set up a hammock between the tops of two lamp posts, and lie down. it turns out sleep is rarely funny.

in the morning, i find that i actually feel well rested. none of that bursting feeling has left me.

i can’t take this. i walk straight to the ER. a couple serious injuries get prioritized over me but they take it seriously after i collapse.

as i lie in the hospital bed, disbelieving that ive managed to find myself in another bed so quickly, i hear the sound of her heels clacking down the hallway towards me. she pauses. “so close.” the sound of walking resumes again, past me now and into the distance. my consciousness sinks into nothing. i couldn’t lose that much of myself and survive.