You can’t change your family but you also aren’t stuck with them. I hope you can spend this Christmas with people who love you and give you every kindness.

https://buttondown.com/monteiro/archive/how-to-bury-your-father/

Sometimes, to raise our children we have to bury our fathers multiple times. And here I will finally begin to answer your question: How do you lovingly care for an aging parent who treated you like shit? And look, I’ll be straight up and tell you that I had no idea where this was going when I started, but it revealed itself. You loving care for an aging parent by protecting his grandchildren from his sins. You lovingly care for an aging parent by making sure that the way they treated you stops with you. You lovingly care for an aging parent by learning how to love others, and by letting them love you. You lovingly care for an aging parent by digging multiple graves, the first one for their sins, and the second one for their body.